When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Normal issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t a denying that sober curiosity has elevated not too long ago. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and inspecting their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. Right now we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we are able to do if we’re excited about a sober (fully alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private determination, however when you’re any form of an everyday drinker (which means three or 4 nights every week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the best way you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other means. When you’re not consuming through the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for at the least 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely is just not doable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any concept how shitty you actually really feel if you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It often takes a number of weeks to your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/finest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is dependent upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see when you may make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or had been you on the lookout for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is admittedly what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. When you spend numerous time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which ends up in numerous “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly wish to take a step again.

You won’t even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply turn out to be a part of your inside chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No onerous alcohol through the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so forth.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on every week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming had been full of elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been continually shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down every day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s now not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I wouldn’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra conscious strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions must be explored when excited about alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the assumption that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and reasonable, mannequin to make use of on the subject of speaking about alcohol is the thought of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t have to hit any kind of a all-time low earlier than you’ll be able to discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

When you’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I’d counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get inquisitive about your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to assume. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you desire a poisonous substance to play a task within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the particular person I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this state of affairs?

Tam: What if our pals have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you’ve got solutions/suggestions for methods to make this a part of my life-style with my consuming pals? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to search out new pals – haha. However, critically, if your pals really respect and assist you within the choices you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re frequently making an attempt to push you to begin consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definately would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. You might want to determine for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your buddy group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately would possibly want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to switch that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most primary sober particular person round – and I’m pleased with consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing slightly extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on hearth! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – assume flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m frequently impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. When you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam